The beautiful California coast is disappearing, The Los Angeles Times wrote yesterday. The beautiful, sandy beaches are giving way to retaining walls tucked up close to property lines trying to keep the ocean out of homes built on sand. Even the bluffs, with their towering beauty are coming down, along with some of the homes and apartments. Private homes, scenic Highway 1, the railroad, and business are all in danger.
The 1970's scientists warned the homes built on the bluff would destabilize it. Common sense said don't build a house on sand. Environmentalists warned of environmental dangers. All people heard was the pleasing sound of waves pounding the shore as their eyes feasted on the panoramic views and they parted with bundles of money.
It's not unlike us, feasting our eyes on beauty and trying to own it in the way we look, either by creating it if we feel we don't have it or bolstering it if we think we have some.
Entertainment, according to the dictionary means, "the action of providing or being provided with amusement or enjoyment."
Sure, that sounds fun. I'm in.
But this busy, modern world of ours has left many exhausted. Two radio hosts in my city recently joked that the next best thing to having company is when they cancel. That gave them a night to relax.
The dictionary describes company, companionship as "looking for the fellowship of friendly people."
That sounds more relaxing. Exactly what many of us look for, right?
A quick flip though magazines and books to help with your next gathering offers extensive ideas on how to spend more money and give more time to pull off the perfect gathering. Martha Stewart, a self proclaimed perfectionist, began this movement and many others have followed her cared out path.
My favourite definition of a perfectionist is, "One who takes great pains and gives them to another." (Author unknown) Martha and her proteges,...
Who are you? Where do you come from? Who are your parents? Who are your grandparents? Where did they grow up? What fashioned their lives? Love? War? Community? Isolation? Trauma? Blessings? Abundance?
None of us are just here. Those who came before each of us had lives. They lived in a time where culture had certain bents, certain ideologies. Their generation was meant to bring something new to the world. Each generation is suppose to disrupt something, leave their imprint on life. It keeps things fresh and moving.
Each of us has what our family line has lived through in us in varying degrees. When visiting one of my uncles last summer with my family, he talked about loving soup and so did his sisters. My daughters and I looked at each other. I make soup all the time.
So that's where it comes from. That a side of the family.
The body really does talk. Just not always in words.
I have been reading a lot on mindfulness lately. It is based on wisdom that has been around since at least bible times, however the western world seems to have walked away from it - maybe as we became industrialized?
Mindfulness is paying attention. In the western world we pay a lot of attention to the outer, material things. Is our car/house/body/personality nice enough? What do other people think? In the eastern world, many kept paying attention to thinks like wisdom, silence, honor, and staying at a slower pace than we do.
Both the inner and outer world are import. Both equally matter. Everything is connected, so if one part is out of order, everything suffers. In North America, we have grown out of whack with listening to the quieter things. Which is where the deeper wisdom often is. And as you know, wisdom makes the world go round. It makes the difference between a life well-lived and one...
The research is in. And it is telling us that things we commonly referred to as "time-wasters" like walking around the block, chatting with a co-worker, watching a funny show, and smelling the roses, actually rejuvenates us and makes us sharper. This is good news in a culture that keeps telling us to multi-task, so we can do more, accomplish more, and get further ahaed.
This is good news to me. For the longest time I thought something was wrong with me, as I would lag behind without resting and rejuvenating. Ten minutes of day-dreaming, staring out at the mountain view from my window, chatting for a few minutes with a family, or watching a home renovation show on HGTV seemed to magically improve my abilities, so I was quietly stealing away for these moments.
I loved these moments, and would even laude their effects to others, but quietly, a good article on productivity and multi-tasking that would demonstrate the strengths of getting more done could sometimes ma...
To like being in your own skin is a beautiful thing. Karen Cook
To not like who you are is the same thing as spending time with someone else you do not like. It feels uncomfortable. Stressful. And you want to get away from them, especially after a certain amount of time.
Except you can't get away from yourself.
To love yourself feels the same as when you feel the love of someone else. The sun shines. You enjoy being with them. They make you smile, feel comfortable, and relaxed. You can be your real, authentic self around them. And you want to be with them.
Do you hear that? You want to be with yourself when you love yourself. You like your place in this world and you enjoy your existence here. You have value for yourself. That's a great deal!
Dislike of self tells you something is wrong with you, that you need to change who you are. And it encourages you to be negative, critical, and demeaning toward yourself; to not accept who yo...
Your life is created by the choices you make in daily living. And while life does happen around you and to you, it is your thoughts, decisions and habits that create the effect and direction your life takes. It is what happens first quietly within yourself that creates a force that charts your life's course.
Author and speaker, Anthony Robbins, conducts an exercise that asks people to look around the room and notice everything that is brown around them. He then has everyone close their eyes and recount all they saw that was green. He concludes with saying, "You can only focus on one thing at a time. So choose well."
Living consciously allows you to realize your thoughts and decisions in your daily life. It gives you the opportunity to stop life from acting on you and wakes you up to see the power of your own ability to choose and thereby create a life in line with your values and belief's.
Take the time you need to ensure you are focusing on the things you reall...
Years ago I was talking with a friend in a acquaint, European style cafe in Edmonton, when she looked at me and exclaimed, "You have a heart-shaped face." It reminded her, she said, of author, C.S. Lewis' love story with is wife. His wife had a heart-shaped face as well, which he loved.
Soon after the Lewis' were married, they purchased a new car. They loved it and found it quite beautiful. But as they stood looking at it, they had an ax in hand between them. And in the spirit of their agreed upon decision to never let anything material come between them, they raised the ax together, and lowered it to their new car, denting it. Shocking, huh?
They did this because they decided not to let material possessions and how things look come between them.
As an eating disorder therapist, I've seen first hand how damaging image is to a family and the individuals within it. Whole family systems can operate around the idea that how they appear to o...
Loving your body and your life is a hard thing to do for first world people and loving your body or not affects your life. Thinking about your body size and shape being "right" or "wrong" began in North America when an insurance company devised a height/weight chart. Before this, when people dieted, they spoke of feeling better for changing the way they ate. After this height/weight chart was made and used for insurance purposes, dieting grew to become focused on changing one's body size and shape.
You don't have to have an eating disorder to struggle to like your body. Women are constantly asked to evaluate if their body is fine the way it is, from the top of their head to the tip of their toes, by advertising companies. And indirectly women are told, each body part they are asked to evaluate, is inadequate, and therefore they need to spend money to fix the body part.
Kind of hard to like yourself after regular doses of this message.
Mindfulness is paying attention to what is happening as it is happening. It is called, "Living in the moment". You are not in the future or in the past. You are in the present. Mindfulness happens when you are aware of the soft carpet beneath your feet as you go down the hallway, when you savour the smell of coffee wafting from the pot, and you sit down and noticed your plate of food looks beautiful. It is a beneficial way to live.
You are eating mindfully, as you can now guess, when you pay attention to what you are eating. The pace of modern life often has us scarfing down food as fast as we can so we can get on with our busy schedule. When we do this, we're not aware of what we are eating, even if we've been craving it, and it is our favorite food.
When mindfully eating, you notice the food you're about it eat. You slow down. You take time to look at the food in front of you. You see the colors, the shape, and the size. If it...